1. |
Third Degree Gurns
03:09
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One little, two little, three little ketamins
Four little, five little, six little magic beans
Seven little, eight little, nine little lines of beak
Ending the night with a joint
Sat at home, pendulous jaw
Where should I sit? On the couch or the floor
Spark up a biff trying to stop the spin
Let me sleep, my head's like a bin
Passed the fuck out, spliff full of haze
While around you the place is a blaze
It was all fun throwing shapes all night. Now my face is burned to fuck
and gave me nan a fright
Passed the fuck out, spliff full of haze
While around you the place is a blaze
Now I can't cover up the burns, I've got third degree gurns
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2. |
Masturbational Burnout
01:47
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I can’t stop the urges
Blue pills to revive stumpy
Check out my google searches
My wank bank’s in the red
I just need to purge this
Fixation on masturbation
From my chamber I’m emerging
Behold my Kleenex Kingdom
Battling through shaft chafage and strained tendons
RSI is a burden in my life
My blistered bloody helmet
For years I've overwhelmed it
Because hardcore, softcore, there’s something you can not ignore
This fappening is happening to me
The WiFi's down, its before the watershed
The Matalan catalogue will have to do instead
I savour the challenge
In my quest I will scavenge for ....
Anistons pokeys, Embarrassing Bodies
Rachel on Countdown, maybe even Vorders
Sexy newsreaders, milfy school teachers.
Lingerie mannequins, pics of Anne Boleyn
A slip of the tit on Strictly. I’m really not too picky
Milking stumpy is my victory
It's an endurance sport
Pounding floppy into dust
I'm an ejaculate drought
Milking myself bone dry
It's time for me to fap out
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3. |
Slovakian Traffic Cone
02:17
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Dark web secrets, unheard bedroom acts
Awash with bodily fluids. Well here's the facts
Liberate a cone. Regulation is the key
Jam it up the hole. Next to where they pee
As if this ain't enough
Enough to make you boak
Release your stomach contents
Down the traffic slope
Wash it down with piss
Cocktail of fetid mush
As if this isn't enough
Follow it down with spunk
Standing aloft
Fingers jammed up
Release the sloppy chum
Bathe in the piss and shit and swallow down the come
This is the Slovakian Traffic Cone
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